Wedding burnout is a very real experience for many engaged couples. The stress of budgeting mixed with the complicated mix of emotions and relationships can quickly turn the fun process of planning your wedding into a nightmare that you just want to end. I’ve found that brides and grooms are most likely to get burned out right around the time that wedding invitations are going out. You’re in the height of the hustle and bustle, but not quite close enough to the big day to let your worry and concern move aside.
There are many contributing factors to wedding burnout:
Budget constraints: When money is tight, you’re bound to become stressed and exhausted faster than usual. Trying to manage a budget without worrying about counting pennies is hard enough. Add to it the stress of making each dollar count and the fatigue from (possibly) working extra jobs or overtime hours, and you can imagine the emotional rollercoaster you’re setting up.
Family pressure: We talk about it all the time, but it’s always worth mentioning again: your wedding planning will likely include the opinions (wanted or otherwise) and emotions (rational or otherwise) of your loved ones. Trying to meet the needs and desires of your family and stretching to accommodate them puts a strain on your mental and emotional capacity.
Bickering and differing opinions: And then there are the disagreements between you and your partner. You won’t agree on everything, and you shouldn’t. Your lives would be pretty boring. But sometimes disagreeing with your partner can add tension or strain, especially if you’re already trying to deal with budget constraints and family pressure. The bickering may be small, but all it takes is a final straw to break the camel’s back.
But the upside is there are also plenty of ways to avoid, or at least lessen the effects of wedding burnout:
Take some alone time with your partner, wedding-free. Seriously, you need to take time with your partner that has nothing to do with the wedding. In fact, go ahead and ban the word “wedding” and any words associated with your wedding. Remember, your wedding is one day in your entire life with your partner. Spend a date night (or two, or seven) talking about your job, your friends, your future house, the babies you do or don’t want, the world you are going to travel — anything but your wedding.
Go out with your friends, without your partner. Look, sometimes you need a break from your partner, not because she/he is driving you crazy, but because you need a reminder of who you are outside of your significant other. And let’s face it, your friends will know you and have a connection to you that your partner can’t. No matter how close you are to your partner, there’s always some things you can speak more openly about with your friends.
Plus, it’s fun. No, really, you may think you’re tired after working 80 hours and negotiating five contracts this week, but once you’re out with your friends you’ll forget about all that stress and exhaustion.